movie making with john, improving script, letting the camera roll for hours, me painting late in the night, tired before, more tired now, john feeding me advice, direction, moving around me like a cat with a camera luking in the shadows, starting and stopping me, jamie again, move into the light, and we proceed, and then suddenly i’m too tired to act, to recite and moving into just being in the moment, inspired, embodied and things are happening, i’m not rushing, not scared, the words and the paint just start to flow. its part of johns and my creative process, part of the performer in both of us, the longer we go the more tired i get the more real it gets. i call it a good way of getting brave. we’ll do it again and again, saving the footage, it keeps us honest and fresh
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